Chix Chat Pro Football

The Wife of a Football Team Owner...

Posted by Friday, November 11, 2011

I have a confession. I’m the wife of a football team owner. If I’m not spending my days on the tennis courts, I’m being pampered at the salon. My limo driver thinks I’m crazy, and my personal chef wants me to get fat.

OK, I’m totally lying, but my husband does “own” a team. It’s just a fantasy team. My REAL confession is that I despise fantasy football. There, I said it. And I’ll say it again. I. Hate. Fantasy. Football.

I’ve heard all the arguments – it makes Sunday more exciting… it’s fun to have the rivalry with your buddies…it gets you interested in games other than your own team’s…you learn a lot about the players from other teams…blah, blah, fricking, blah. It’s BS and I’ll tell you why.

1. There is no “fun rivalry” when 10 grown men fight like little school girls on draft day. If a guy takes too long to pick, or eats the last chicken wing, or takes a top-ranked player that he doesn’t even need just to screw the rest of the league – watch out, ladies. You’ll want to become a preschool teacher just to be around more maturity.

2. If the Ravens play at the coveted (to me) 1 o’clock spot, there are tons of other games at the same time, so the boys have their eyes on their fantasy scores more than the TV screen. A few Sundays ago, I was in the kitchen grabbing the next course of appetizers when I heard my husband cussing in the living room. Thinking I had missed yet another false start by Michael Oher, I ran into the living room to find that the source of his ire was because Stat Tracker wasn’t working. Give me a heart attack, would ya?

3. I do have to give my husband some props because he’ll bench one of his stronger players if they are playing against the Ravens that week. While his focus might not be 100% on the Ravens game, his loyalty is thankfully purple through and through. Or so I thought! My husband’s FIRST pick this year for his fantasy team was a running back from that team-who-must-not-be-named. Ah hellfire, we can say it out loud now that we SWEPT them this season. He picked Rashard Mendenhall from the Steelers.

Really? So some part of you every weekend has to ROOT for our mortal enemy. Really? It was the first round of the draft, there were surely other good players still available!

I could go on, but I doubt any of you want to listen to me whine any longer so I’ll wrap it up. I suppose if my husband ends up in the money, the fantasy football thing might be OK for me. But even if he wins his league this year, we won’t break even.

So for this Ravens Chick, I’ll just stick to watching my Ravens. This season’s roller coaster ride is about all I can handle any given Sunday. I know a lot of you ladies out there have your own fantasy teams, so I’d love to hear your comments.

Mind your x’s and o’s...

The Purple Maven


  1. gail kirby Says:
  2. Great article and true! Although, even though I am a girl and wife, I have to say that I am now in a fantasy football league myself. It's pretty exciting and all those reasons they give you are true and correct :) Try it, you might like it :)

  3. PurpleMaven Says:
  4. @Gail - If I were totally honest, I do look at my husband's fantasy team each week only to tell him who to play, why he shouldn't play so-and-so, etc. Another reason I don't like his fantasy team because I typically end up doing most of the maintenance LOL! I didn't want to throw the poor guy under the bus too much since I have to live with him :)


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