Joe Flacco is about to become a father for the first time. He and his wife Dana announced months ago that they are expecting their first child on June 17 with the gender being a surprise. Now, we all know he is “Joe Cool” on the football field but how do you think he will be as a father?
First time dads show no fear until you bring that little bundle of joy home.
That’s when the panic sets in.
You have this tiny little thing that depends on you for everything, sleepless nights, eating cold food (or even eating at all), and frequent diaper changes. Gone are the spur of the moment date nights, sex in the kitchen, and clothes without a stain. Since most first time dads never get it right (sorry guys, but you don’t. Our hormones are still crazy, we are tired, and feel as sexy as a bear.) I felt it necessary to share with Joe some tips that will not only save his head from a football that Dana throws at it but to help Joe step in when he is most needed.
Dear Joe Flacco,
Congratulations on the impending arrival of your little bundle of joy! This is an exciting time with many glorious changes coming your way. Not only do you have your team on the field to lead, you now have a little one that will look up to you for guidance, look upon you with admiration and love, and will test your patience at the drop of a hat.
As a mom of 2 spawns of the devil (they are believe me, but I love them unconditionally) who was not the easiest to get along with in the first few months, I want to pass on some words of wisdom that will keep you in the good graces of the new mommy.
1. Do it her way!
Your way is wrong, will always be wrong, and if you want your butt intact without a chunk taken out of it, you will listen to her explain how to do it. Follow her directions to a “T.”
2. Do not play “ignore the baby”
If your little one starts crying in the middle of the night and you awaken, get up! Even if she is breast feeding, bringing the little bundle of noise to her and giving her those few extra seconds of sleep does wonders. If you ignore it, expect to wake with bruises or soreness in the ribs where she kicked you while you were sleeping.
3. Change the diaper
If you smell a God awful smell and it wasn’t the dog or yourself, you can bet a diaper needs to be changed. Do not get up and leave the room all of a sudden because you remembered you forgot to do something or take a quick trip to go get you both something to eat. Change the diaper first, and then ask her what she would like to eat and go get it.
4. Give her a break.
Even if it’s just 5 minutes, let her have some time alone without someone attached to her hip. Let her go to the bathroom in peace, take a bubble bath, call a friend or even take a quick nap. You and the little one can sit and watch SportsCenter alone while she takes a few minutes to decompress. This makes for a happy Momma which in return will make a happy Joe!
5. Enjoy the cuddle time
They grow up way too fast and before you know it they are moving and shaking. Enjoy this time because once they learn the destruction and fun they can create while on the move, cuddling will be a thing of the past.
The happier and more rested Dana is, the happier you will be. Becoming a parent is one of the best things in life but it is also one of the hardest things in life that you will ever do.
Again, congratulations to you both! Just remember my advice and you will not only stay in her good graces, you’ll be rewarded somehow some way when you least expect it.